August 27, 2003 12:47am
Mary Carey Busts into Politics - Porn Star has Boobinatorial Aspirations
by: John Boseman
More that a hundred candidates threw their hats in the ring for the California Recall Election. But Mary Carey went further - she threw all her clothes in the ring. Now if she can just distract everyone in state government long enough so they can't do any actual governing, the state might be saved.
Many male voters who have long complained about getting screwed by politicians now are having second thoughts. With Mary in the race, the idea seems somehow more appealing.
No other politician can demonstrate so dramatically they have nothing to hide. It is definitely not her tax returns the press wants to see. It is her great platform and awesome naked ambition.
If she wins, state government will finally gain some respect. After all, politics is the world's second oldest profession, and not much different from the first. Having someone in office who is honest about it would be a big improvement.
Mary will be the only elected official who can straighten out the crooked pricks in state government. She will never be able to say, "I make no bones about it."
She will finally get people's minds off such extraneous matters as budgets, jobs, and energy, and focus on the important issue - sex. She will end voter apathy and really get people aroused. Think of the savings on Viagra alone.
Instead of press conferences, she could show her movies, giving the press a chance to do some penetrating analysis. If her speeches are anything like her pictures, they could be very persuasive. She always has a couple of really good points in her pictures.
She will solve the energy problem and the traffic problem both at the same time by getting everybody to stay home and have sex. Single guys can stay home and help solve the problems single-handedly.
She will end court backlogs and crowded prisons by helping everybody get off. She will negotiate good deals for California because she knows what to do when it gets down to the short hairs.
Although in many ways she is a refreshing change on the political scene, there is one thing she definitely has in common with most politicians - she really sucks. But in her case, it is a compliment.
First published at Bojiggly Naked Women. Please follow the link below for this complete article, and many other naked women of interest.
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