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April 01, 2001 09:00am
Biggest Adult Event in History!
Source: The Bush Administration
by: Parody Press Release

(WHITE SANDS, NM) - Get ready for the biggest Adult event in HISTORY! The entire Adult Entertainment Industry is hereby invited to one of the greatest extravaganzas in the beautiful White Sands Arena. Free food and amenities, free lodging, and a chance to win cash prizes of over a MILLION DOLLARS!!

The morning events will consist of contests for the best dance moves, introducing new talent by old favorites and BIG CASH PRIZES! The afternoon will feature celebrity speakers and an awards show with BIG CASH PRIZES! Celebrity speakers include John Ashcroft on "We Mean You No Harm" and President George W. Bush with "We Really Like You Guys"

And don't worry about getting busted for your wild lap dances during the evening. There will be no undercover police or security after the guest speakers leave. Then get ready to enjoy the biggest fireworks display in history when the United States Air Force detonates a nuclear device directly overhead in the clear New Mexico sky!

So bring plenty of sunblock and get ready for the time of your lives! And remember, everyone who attends will win BIG CASH PRIZES!

Warped and Depraved Decadence

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