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Caliente Swinger Vacations!

Eva Angelina at Twistys

June 25, 2009 03:50am
MWA: Christina Aguchi, Brooke Haven, Dyanna Lauren
Source: Adult Industry News
by: Myles Shaffer

Myles' Weekend Adventures: Bonjour mon amis! Comment ca va? Myles Shaffer here. This week the discussion will range from the Spearmint Rhino Entertainer of the Year to a private VIP customer appreciation party. So, let's get to it without any further ado!

Christina Aguchi

Thursday evening, June 4Th, I went to the downtown Los Angeles Spearmint Rhino to say hello to retired adult film star, experienced feature dancer, and the currently reigning 2009 Spearmint Rhino Entertainer of the Year, Christina Aguchi, and to observe her last show of the evening!

Christina was the bronze medal winner in the showgirl category of the 2009 Golden G-String Awards in New Orleans last February. More recently, she was the grand championship winner in the newcomers division of the Exotic Dancer National Championships a few weeks ago! (The contest was held at the Pink Pony South, in Atlanta, Georgia.) These wins were no easy task. In both contests, Christina went up against some of the finest feature dancers in the business!

For various reasons, I missed Christina's first show and first signing of the evening. Actually, I had decided that I simply didn't want to go anywhere. Then, about the time I should have been heading out the door, I changed my mind, ran upstairs to shower and shave, etc., and headed for the club.

I might have still gotten there in time for Christina's first show, but I had to make two stops before I could ultimately get under way to the club.

To start her final show of the evening, the only one that I saw, Christina wore a gold jester's mask with red and black trim. The other parts of her costume were a jacket that was black on the left side, red on the right side and had ruffled white cuffs, and a pair of pants that were red on the left side and black on the right side. (Both the jacket and the pants were, for the most part, completely covered with sequins. At least I believe they were sequins. (One of these days, I must attempt to get a closer look and try to determine just exactly what it is that makes this costume sparkle so.)

Beneath her jacket, Christina wore a sleeveless, backless, white midriff top with large ruffled lapels. Under the top, she wore a black bra with big red stars on the breast cups, and beneath her pants, she wore a red and black G- string. For footwear, Christina sported a pair of clear plastic, stiletto-heeled, shoes.

As a prop, Christina used a large red jack-in-the-box style box that sat to one side of the stage. The box even had a large crank handle on one side. It also had lines of black trim on the corners and edges, and a large, black, 'C', on the front.

At one point in the show, after having taken off her mask and her jacket, Christina climbed into the, ''jack-in-the-box,'' and closed the lid. Just a few seconds later, Christina opened the lid, fired a popper and stood up amid the cloud of large confetti pieces that rained down onto the stage. She then stepped out of the box and danced across the stage cranking the handle of a toy jack-in-the-box until, ''Jack,'' popped up out of the box. Christina then discarded the toy and proceeded to get into her performance big time! (Actually, I don't see how she could have done any better than she was already doing!)

This show was performed to, ''Lose Control,'' by Missy Elliot, ''Youth Gone Wild,'' by Skid Row, and the theme song from the movie, ''Fame.'' (I still don't know whether or not the theme song was from the original movie or the recent remake, or if there is any difference.)

Christina is an excellent performer, and I would have to say that her, ''Jack-in-the-Box,'' show is the most impressive piece of work I have seen in a long time! In fact, according to Christina herself, it is the show that cinched her Exotic Dancer contest win!

Whenever Christina performs, she actually dances, and she performs a good amount of great pole work!

Christina's interaction with the tip rail customers is usually very good, but she only seems to interact with two or three randomly selected customers per show. However, I must say that the lady could not perform so greatly as she does if she were to take the time out to play with all of the customers seated at the stage. (the tip rail tends to fill up whenever Christina takes the stage.)

Some people might feel that Christina could find a better balance between performing and playing with the customers. I myself doubt it, and I have always been perfectly happy with the way she performs her shows. It has been a while since I have seen a feature dancer so good Christina!

Christina is an exotic mixture of Chinese and Vietnamese with long black hair and brown eyes. She is five feet three inches tall, weighs in at one hundred thirty-five pounds, and her measurements are 36D-25-39. I don't want anybody to start thinking that Christina's butt may be a little too large. I can personally attest to the fact that she has a great looking posterior! What some might think are three inches of excess fatty tissue, is actually caused by one of the five sets of the roundest, most beautiful buns I have ever had the extreme pleasure of viewing (the other sets of gorgeous buns belong to Carrie Bare, Nina Mercedez, Inari Vachs and Zoe.) When I said something similar to Christina, the first time I met her, she chuckled and said that she had done a lot of squats to get those incredibly round, firm, beautiful buns!

In my own personal opinion, everything about Christina is very impressive! She is a unique and very talented lady. She is also smart, very friendly, has a great sense of humor, can hold a conversation with anybody, and she appears to really enjoy meeting and chatting with her fans.

I myself plan to see Christina perform again as many times as humanly possible, and I can see no reason why anybody should ever fail to take advantage of any opportunity they might get to go to any club within a couple hundred miles from their homes to see Christina perform and to meet her in person! I feel that Christina is an absolute must see!

Christina doesn't seem to have an official website at this time; although, a lot of sites that feature photos and video clips of her can be found by doing a search for her on the Internet. She can also be visited on MySpace at: MySpace.com/Christina09SR

Brooke Haven

Friday night, June 5Th, I drove out to the Rialto Spearmint Rhino to spend some time with Brooke Haven and to observe her first two shows of the evening.

For her first show, Brooke wore a long sleeved midriff jacket that was covered with white sequins and trimmed with lines of red sequins. The jacket also had six racing patches on the chest, three per side, six racing patches on the right sleeve and five on the left sleeve. It additionally had a black and white checkered flag design across the back of the shoulder area, two small crossed black and white checkered flags at mid-back, and a small racing patch at the lower back. Brooke also wore a belt that was completely covered with black sequins and a pair of rather revealing black briefs-style bottoms. Beneath her outer garments, Brooke wore a bra that had the breast cups covered with white sequins. The straps of the bra were covered with red sequins. There were also two crossed black and white checkered flags on each breast cup. And lastly, Brooke also wore a red G-string, and for footwear, she wore a pair of knee-length, high-heeled, red boots with platform soles.

Brooke performed this show to, ''Go Speed Racer Go,'' from the, ''Speed Racer,'' movie. (the song was performed by Ali Dee and the Deekompressors.) This was followed by, ''Imagine that,'' by R Kelly. Brooke's last song was a hip-hop number that was written and recorded in honor of her. It is entitled, ''Brooke Haven,'' and it is performed by Xl.

For her second appearance on stage, Brooke performed her, ''Michael Jackson Show. For this performance, she wore a silver stylized business suit with vertical black lines. There was a wide black stripe down the outside of each of the legs of the pants. Brooke additionally wore a white tie with a black rose and decorated with some sort of diamond-like stones. Beneath her suit jacket, Brooke wore a black bra. The bra's breast cups were covered with silver sequins that formed a flower-like design. Under her suit pants, Brooke wore a black G-string, and on her feet, she wore a pair of black shoes with spike heels and platform soles.

During this show, Brooke performed to, ''Smooth Criminal,'' by Michael Jackson, ''Little Bird,'' by Annie Lennox, ''Money Can't Buy it,'' also by Annie Lennox, and, ''Brooke Haven,'' once again.

Brooke's interaction with the tip rail patrons during both of these shows was so good as it always is.

Brooke is a beautiful, intelligent, fun-loving woman with a very great sense of humor. She can joke and wisecrack with the best of them!

I keep on forgetting to ask Brooke about her physical statistics, but per her website, she is five feet two inches tall, weighs one hundred twenty-two pounds and her bust measurement is 34C. The website says nothing about her waist and hip measurements. Although, I can testify to the fact that Brooke's entire body looks great! Hopefully, I will someday remember to ask Brooke for the rest of her measurements.

Brooke Haven is an entertaining feature and is not be missed. So, if anybody gets the chance to get to a club and see Brooke perform and meet her in person, they should do so at the earliest opportunity! She is well worth the effort!

Brooke can checked out at: BrookeHaven.com

Dyanna Lauren

Saturday, June 6Th, at about 6:55 PM, I called the City of Industry Spearmint Rhino to clarify some conflicting information. I had been seeing some things on the Internet that said Dyanna Lauren would be performing one show only at 1:00 Am. I had seen other items that said she would be performing two shows. Fortunately for me, the general manager answered the phone, and he told me that there was going to be a private VIP Customer Appreciation party for 8:00 to 11:30 PM, and that Dyanna would be performing at 10:00 PM for the party, and again at 1:00 Am for the general public. He also informed me that the e-mail he send me a few days earlier was my invitation to the party.

For the private party show, Dyanna wore a long-sleeved very short jacket. She also wore a black corset. The corset had wide red ribbons that hung from the breast cups, wrapped around her waist a couple of times, tied into a large bow in the small of her back, then hung down almost to the backs of her knees. Dyanna additionally wore a red fishnet halter-top. Next she wore a fingerless, glove-like, black fishnet piece on her left arm. This glove-like piece when from the hand to the top of the shoulder. Dyanna also wore a wide black belt from which red strips of material about a foot long hung down all the way around the bottom edge. In addition to all of this, Dyanna wore black thong-like bottoms, and for footwear, she wore a pair of mid-thigh length, black, stiletto-heeled boots.

I first met Dyanna at the 1999 Exotic Dancer Fan Fair Tradeshow, I think it was. She shared a table with Jenteal during the tradeshow. What a pair of beautiful women, and the sight of them sitting together was spectacular!

I swear, after ten years, Dyanna doesn't look a day older!

When Dyanna was on stage, she performed as if she had never missed a single weekend. She still has it!

Late in the show, Dyanna tossed out several 8X10s, at least one magazine, and two or three DVDs to, ''the loudest customers.''

Dyanna ended the show with the most sensuous hot candle wax bit I've ever seen. I've seen many performers do the hot candle wax thing, but none of them have ever done it any better than Dyanna did on this night!

Dyanna performed this show to, ''Crazy Bitch,'' by Buckcherry, and, ''Come Together,'' by the Beatles. Unfortunately, I didn't recognize her third song, and the DJ couldn't remember what it might have been. Dyanna's fourth and fifth songs were, ''Dirty Deeds,'' by AC/DC, and, ''Little Sister,'' by Gerard McMann.

If anybody ever gets a chance to go to a club, a tradeshow, or whatever, and meet Dyanna and hopefully get to see her perform, absolutely do not allow the opportunity to slip away. It will be an experience of a lifetime!

Dyanna is suppose to have a brand new website launching this month. The site can be found at: DyannaLauren.com

In the meantime, there are many Internet sites that have photos of Dyanna. Also, to see another side of Dyanna that many people haven't seen, go to: www.youtube.com/watch?v=rw9NlGHrYw0 and watch the YouTube video clip.

As much as I would have loved to say hello to Dyanna and possibly chat for a few minutes, by the time she had finished her show, the club had become entirely too crowded and hectic for my taste. Therefore, I didn't stay to say hello as much as I hated not doing so.

Since I didn't stay to speak with Dyanna, I obviously didn't get a chance to ask her about her physical statistics. However, according to Wikipedia, she is five feet six inches tall, weighs one hundred fifteen pounds, and measures 38D-22-33. She has long, thick, blonde hair, and her eyes are blue-green.

This was a star-studded night, at least during the private party portion of the evening. Some of the people in attendance were Eric Sikkenga, the vice president of the Spearmint Rhino Corporation, September Dawn, the founder of A List Talent, adult film stars Melissa Jacobs, Ruby Knox, Lindsey Meadows, Priya Anjali Rai, Rhyse and Rhylee Richards (I still didn't get to meet them), Celeste Star, and a few others I didn't know or recognize whether I should have or not.

That will just about do it for another week. Let us all meet back here the next time and continue the ongoing discussion of hot, gorgeous, women! Until then, everybody stay safe, have a great week, and live life as if there were no tomorrow!

Bonsoir et au revoir,
Myles Shaffer

Are you TOUGH ENOUGH for Joanna Angel?

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